Should I ask him out? Dating expert Marni Battista considers why staying silent often means missing out.
Despite an enormous single population, meeting the right person in the UK through conventional means is often challenging- explaining why so many internet users look now online to date.
For social neurologist Arthur Aron, “people do meet through friends, but it’s difficult and that’s probably the single biggest virtue of online dating”. Yet online dating does not always bring the perfect partner immediately. Finding somebody truly compatible can take time; but this is all part of ensuring your relationship is a long-lasting success.
For those understandably unwilling to compromise when it comes to love, it can sometimes be difficult to find a date. EliteSingles supports its members by linking compatible matches based on an initial personality profile and your specified search criteria. But, while online dating “offers unprecedented (and remarkably convenient) levels of access to potential partners”, and some users find a date right away, for most it may still take some time and effort to meet that special someone.
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When inspired by stories of online dating successes, it can be demoralising if online matches do not immediately present themselves as an ideal partner. Rest assured, however, that those whose profiles are complete and utilise the many channels of communication on the site, usually find a date and a compatible relationship fairly quickly.
Benefitting From Past Experiences
Eli Finkel, social psychologist at Northwestern University in the USA, correctly writes that “each new person you meet online is a chance for a spark that is worth exploring”. But even if dates do not produce the dream relationship, this does not always mean time wasted.
Recognising the reasons why a promising start did not begin a serious relationship is, regardless, a valuable exercise, and is often a necessary part of the search- especially for those later in life who are just returning to dating. Identifying why certain dates did not meet expectations focuses the mind and provides a valuable indicator of exactly what you want in a future relationship; for a successful relationship requires mutual values and goals, not just attraction.
Even if after a few dates a suitable partner has not been found, maintaining a pro-active, enthusiastic attitude is vital. Sandy Weiner points to the importance of pro-activity to find a date, arguing “if you give up because of disappointment, your chance of finding love is almost nil…it’s about taking action to find a wonderful person with whom to create a lasting relationship”.
The route to eventual relationship success should be as enjoyable as the destination itself; instead of becoming disheartened or focusing on dating too heavily, it is often beneficial to see friends or start a new hobby; “taking on new challenges and trying out different things will put you in a position to meet lots more people”.
At EliteSingles we try to boost your luck in finding love as much as possible. Online dating may not immediately lead to the perfect man or woman, yet our members can be confident of long, happy relationships when they do meet the person sharing their lifestyle and values.
So, what are you waiting for? Sign up to EliteSingles free today.